JOURNAL PROMPT – January 17, 2021 – The title of a movie of your life would be?

There is no doubt about it … the old boy and I are in the final quarter of our lives. And, this reality has been taking up more space in my awareness of late. I noticed myself thinking the other day that I have had a pretty good life. And then of course, in true INFJ fashion, I found myself questioning what I thought was so great about it???

It was a weird juxtaposition because although I feel a sense of satisfaction with the way things have turned out … when I look back over the events, circumstances and situations that have framed my existence, my life has certainly not been without many traumatic challenges, unenviable difficulties … and … unwelcome experiences/situations and people.

And yet, as I reflect back over it all, there is nothing I would change. Well, except maybe the timeliness of my responses. I can see very clearly, in retrospect, that I might have spared myself some undue pain and suffering had I responded differently … sooner … to the events in my world. But, as Maya Angelou has reminded us, we do better once we know better.

That said, I think this is where the story line of my life holds its power. While I have had my fair share of grief, loss and hardship … I do believe that, ultimately, my responses have empowered me rather then disempowered me. When I look back, I can see that I really did make the best of what was positioned before me … even if it took me a while to figure out how to accomplish that feat. I can see that I really did focus upon finding the blessings in the challenges. I really did search for the gold in the dark. I truly believed that there was a pony in the poop … somewhere.

I have never spent a whole lot of time lamenting my lot in life. Which doesn’t mean I haven’t fallen hard. I sure have. I just haven’t gotten stuck in it for too long. I know when I was a child, I didn’t have the luxury of wallowing in the muck. I knew no one was coming to save me. I knew it was on me to figure it out.

That said, I haven’t always seen things clearly. I have sometimes misunderstood myself, my loved ones and the world around me. I have been derailed by my highly-kindled amygdala. I have been unkind to myself. I have made things worse. I have got it wrong. I have been a bull in a china shop. I have been humbled beyond belief. I have cleaned up the messes. I have apologized. I have learned some hard lessons.

Nonetheless, and despite any darkness that descended around me, I can confidently confirm that I have always, always, always looked for the light. I have persistently done my best to turn the lemons into lemonade. I have been chronically committed to creating fertilizer out of the shit. And, I have remained determined to let it grow me.

And, when things have been at their absolute worst … I could unfailingly count on that still, small voice inside of me nudging me out of any hopelessness, helplessness, powerlessness and/or stuckness by persistently pushing me forward with this little query: “How are you going to live a great life anyway?”

And so … I don’t think there is any doubt about it … the name of the movie of my life would be the same as the name of my business page on Facebook/Instagram:

“Live a Great Life Anyway …”

2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Debby
    Jan 19, 2021 @ 22:01:30

    Oh Karen!! I can’t even express all the emotions this brought while reading!! A life beautifully lived, an example to all, inspiring strength and courage, an amazing zest to keep learning!!! Love you 💕

    Like

    Reply

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