JOURNAL PROMPT: April 3, 2022 – What are you most grateful for … ?

I guess it depends on where I am setting my gaze, but there are so many, many, many things to be grateful for … on so many levels … micro, meso and macro. I don’t even think I could create a specific list that fully encompasses or adequately exhausts my appreciation for all the ‘beings’, ‘doings’ and ‘havings’ that shape my life and my experience of things.

I remember many years ago reading a couple of amazing books both written by M. J. Ryan focused upon the power of gratitude. “Attitudes of Gratitude” was an exceptional invitation to hone the lens through which I chose to see the world. I highlighted so much in that book that the pages were yellow. It was a game changer for me.

Another really lovely book filled with invitations to experience the world through lens of gratitude is “A Grateful Heart”.  It is a book of ‘blessings’ upon which to reflect as an evening ‘grace’ before meals. I didn’t use them in that fashion. I tended to use them as morning meditations … inspiring thoughts to underpin my days.

Anyway … I share this because maybe the thing I am most grateful for is that fact that I choose to look with grateful eyes. We typically find whatever it is that we are looking for. If we are looking for what is right, we will find it. If we are looking for what is wrong, we will find that too. I caught an episode of “Oprah” many decades ago in which she spoke about developing a daily gratitude practice. She stated that it had changed her life. I was inspired by that thought. I determined that if it was good enough for Oprah … it would be good enough for me.

So, way back in 1999, I bought a luxurious leather bound journal and started recording my appreciations into it. Every day I jotted down five things I was grateful for … and … I made it a rule that I could not say the same thing twice. So, at the risk of having to repeating myself, I noticed that I started consciously seeking things each day that I could record into my list the next morning.

It was the most amazing thing! I started to recognize all the things that previously escaped my awareness. I became far more conscious about the things that were going well and right, rather than the wrong and bad eclipsing my gaze. This shift in focus generated positive neural pathways for me that got myelinated each and every day. The more I did it, the easier it got.

I recorded my ‘gratitudes’ faithfully for years … and then … fell away from it for some years … and then came back to it again. As you can see, I had determined my 2020 vision was going to be set on “Seeing the Gifts.” If only I had known how difficult but necessary that was going to become ………..

Yes. I am most grateful for my gratitude practice and the way it has shaped my gaze. Even though I am not writing it down each day anymore, I find that my brain is still cued to notice the things that are going well, to see the gifts in my challenges and to bring light to dark … and even … to notice the things that I don’t want, that I don’t have. And, for all of THAT, I am most and ever grateful.

With heartfelt appreciation, 💖 Karen 💖

JOURNAL PROMPT – January 17, 2021 – The title of a movie of your life would be?

There is no doubt about it … the old boy and I are in the final quarter of our lives. And, this reality has been taking up more space in my awareness of late. I noticed myself thinking the other day that I have had a pretty good life. And then of course, in true INFJ fashion, I found myself questioning what I thought was so great about it???

It was a weird juxtaposition because although I feel a sense of satisfaction with the way things have turned out … when I look back over the events, circumstances and situations that have framed my existence, my life has certainly not been without many traumatic challenges, unenviable difficulties … and … unwelcome experiences/situations and people.

And yet, as I reflect back over it all, there is nothing I would change. Well, except maybe the timeliness of my responses. I can see very clearly, in retrospect, that I might have spared myself some undue pain and suffering had I responded differently … sooner … to the events in my world. But, as Maya Angelou has reminded us, we do better once we know better.

That said, I think this is where the story line of my life holds its power. While I have had my fair share of grief, loss and hardship … I do believe that, ultimately, my responses have empowered me rather then disempowered me. When I look back, I can see that I really did make the best of what was positioned before me … even if it took me a while to figure out how to accomplish that feat. I can see that I really did focus upon finding the blessings in the challenges. I really did search for the gold in the dark. I truly believed that there was a pony in the poop … somewhere.

I have never spent a whole lot of time lamenting my lot in life. Which doesn’t mean I haven’t fallen hard. I sure have. I just haven’t gotten stuck in it for too long. I know when I was a child, I didn’t have the luxury of wallowing in the muck. I knew no one was coming to save me. I knew it was on me to figure it out.

That said, I haven’t always seen things clearly. I have sometimes misunderstood myself, my loved ones and the world around me. I have been derailed by my highly-kindled amygdala. I have been unkind to myself. I have made things worse. I have got it wrong. I have been a bull in a china shop. I have been humbled beyond belief. I have cleaned up the messes. I have apologized. I have learned some hard lessons.

Nonetheless, and despite any darkness that descended around me, I can confidently confirm that I have always, always, always looked for the light. I have persistently done my best to turn the lemons into lemonade. I have been chronically committed to creating fertilizer out of the shit. And, I have remained determined to let it grow me.

And, when things have been at their absolute worst … I could unfailingly count on that still, small voice inside of me nudging me out of any hopelessness, helplessness, powerlessness and/or stuckness by persistently pushing me forward with this little query: “How are you going to live a great life anyway?”

And so … I don’t think there is any doubt about it … the name of the movie of my life would be the same as the name of my business page on Facebook/Instagram:

“Live a Great Life Anyway …”

JOURNAL PROMPT – January 6, 2021 – The three things that you need to add to your life are …

Gosh, my life is very full. Sometimes it feels too full. So, I don’t think that there is anything really missing from my life … but I can think of a few things that I would like to add some more of:

More awe … more getting lost in the ‘flow’ of the moment/experience.

I want to lose all track of time and space while capturing the cosmos in more photographs. I want to ‘freeze’ all the exceptional moments offered by Mother Nature with my camera so I can revisit them over and over again. I want to savor more sunsets and sense the sunshine on my skin.

I want to play with colors and textures and piece together more quilting projects. There is such satisfaction in the creative process.

More wonder … more miracles.

I want to abide more in the energy of love than fear. I am eager to read more and write more. I want to get lost in all the stories … both others and my own. I want more opportunity to ponder it all.

And, as much as I want to enjoy those cognitive and emotional connections, I also want to deepen the connection with my body through Essentrics and yoga and lots and lots of walking outdoors.

More wandering … both internally and externally.

I feel inspired to meditate more. I am eager to quiet my mind and embrace the energy of calm and peace. And yet, as much as I yearn for that deep sense of tranquility, I am equally excited to explore my inner landscape … to peer more pensively into all the fascinations and endless curiosities of my INFJ mind.

I also long to move about more in terms of exploring my external world. There is something so enchanting about landing in far away places and experiencing unknown cultures and tastes and energies. I have such fond memories of South East Asia … of Africa … of Europe (both eastern and western) … of Mexico … and even of the USA and Canada. Yes. I definitely crave more travel. I can hardly wait to load up my backpack (with as little as possible) and eagerly anticipating the next destination.

Oh … I have a fourth thing that I must add. I need a cat. I need to add a furry feline friend to my life. As an only child, I always had a cat for a companion. After my beautiful Skruffi passed away, I decided I would not share my life with another animal until we were done the extensive travelling that we have planned for our semi-retirement years. BUT … just as soon as we know we will be spending more at home … I will invite a kitten to join our lives again. I am tickled at the thought of it. Absolutely tickled.

JOURNAL PROMPT – January 4, 2021: Choose a word for the year and explain why you chose it …

I notice the energy of my first posts in these ‘Journal Prompts’ has been focused around the ‘fear’ and ‘disconnect’ and ‘losses’ that we have been marinating in with Covid-19. While I know that both dark and light exist within me, I am eager to balance the scales of my perceptions and consciously shift my gaze away from the fears that can dominate by default.

The word I am going to choose for 2021 is miracles. I am choosing it because as I shared in our gratitude quest, I incorporated my company under the name of “Miracles! Your Center for Well-Being Inc” in 2001 after I was introduced to “A Course in Miracles” and came to understand the notion that a ‘miracle’ is simply a shift in perspective from ‘fear’ to ‘love’.

I am excited to practice this ‘miracle-making’ in my own perceptions by ‘consciously’ focusing on the principles of the ‘Course.’ And, thanks to my Bestie, I have signed up for “Mornings with Marianne”. She is the author of A Return to Love and for this entire next year, we are going to be receiving a video in our email with Marianne discussing the principles of A Course in Miracles.

I worry a bit that I might not complete it all. I have tried … countless times in the past … to study this remarkable text. I have never yet been successful. I worry a bit that my old patterns of getting “too busy” to keep it up might, once again, pre-empt my best intentions here … but … I remind myself to be ‘conscious’ each morning of honoring my intention for 2021. I trust that If I am conscious about where I am putting my time and energy, I will continue to meet with Marianne every morning. I feel prickles of excitement as I say that out loud.

Hmmmm … and … perhaps this year will also yield a lovely celebration on September 12th? I just did the math on that and noticed that 2021 marks my 20th anniversary of founding/working for ‘Miracles!’.

So, yes … it will be a year of ‘miracles’ if I can stick with ‘A Course in Miracles’ while celebrating 20 years of working for ‘Miracles!’.

Change is a process … not an event, 🧡 Karen 🧡

JOURNAL PROMPT – January 3, 2021: Last year was a year of ______. This year will be a year of ______.

Hmmm. It strikes me that last year was a year of disconnection. Maybe this year will be a year of reconnection to that which matters most.

Last year, in 2020, as the moments turned to minutes turned to hours turned to days turned to weeks and turned into months … life (as we had come to know and expect it) was seemingly snatched from all of us – right out of thin air. Air, we were told, that had become unsafe to casually and carefreely inhabit.

And, so, we became disconnected from our daily routines. We were not allowed to go to work. We were isolated from friends and discouraged from visiting family. We were told not to hug … not to touch … to distance from others. Leisure activities were cancelled. Even television programs had to shoot from home. Restaurants closed. Shopping was forced online. All our distractions were denied. Businesses shut down. Schools were closed. Travel was denied. Weddings and funerals were limited/postponed/cancelled due to “Covid restrictions”. All planning was put on hold. Social gatherings were outlawed – first indoors and then even outdoors. And, we were even ‘ordered’ by Public Health to rewrite our most sacred holidays and traditions. The covering of faces became mandatory. An energy of vigilance highjacked our freedom to simply be spontaneous and light-hearted and carefree. We were beseeched not to get close to one another.

Isolate. Distance. Disconnect.

Perhaps, however, there is much to gain from the gap that was created. Maybe 2021 will be an opportunity for us to collectively reconnect in a very conscious and deliberate way. Maybe we can begin to assess where we have been feeding ourselves with empty spoons. Maybe we can, instead, notice where we need to fill our spoons with healthy nourishment. Yes. Maybe we can get clear about what we are really hungry for …

I know, for myself, this past year has offered me a chance to recognize what really feeds my spirit and what doesn’t. I have spent more time writing … and … I can see how much it really fills me. And, as an introvert, a reduction in the typical overstimulation of living such a busy life was an unexpected blessing. My system had more time to recharge.

I notice that the old boy and myself spent more time engaging WITH each other rather than BESIDE each other. We have played more board games and watched less Netflix. We have cooked and cleaned up together in the kitchen. We have found space to tackle ‘the lists’ that never before seemed to take priority.

I spent more time in solitude. I spent more time outside. I took more pictures. I feel more rested.

Yes. Maybe 2021 will be a year of reconnection to our own souls. Maybe we will feed ourselves more of what really matters and less of what doesn’t. Maybe we will recalibrate in the most remarkable ways. Maybe we will look back on 2020 with gratitude?

Maybe it was a gift, in some ways, that we will continue to unwrap in 2021?

Fingers crossed … 🧡 Karen 🧡

Source Unknown … but deeply appreciated.

JOURNAL PROMPT – January 1,2021: How Do You Feel at the Start of a New Year?

I am honestly not sure. I get that the notion of a ‘New Year’ is that we have a whole fresh pallet upon which to paint our days. I do love the thought that we can leave the past in the past and create a whole new future. And yet, if we break it down, we have the opportunity to start anew each and every day. We need not wait for the New Year to change lanes, take a needed turn, speed up or slow down. All of these moments are available to us each and every day. Well, actually, each and every minute of each and every day.

As I often share with my clients, there are no neutral choices. Each seemingly insignificant decision we make is leading us toward the life of our dreams or away from it. And, sadly, we are not always conscious of the choices we are making that are co-creating the shape of our existence. I remember one time we were chatting about what you would wish for if you had one wish. My Dad’s answer has always stuck with me.

“To live consciously.”

Hmmm. I deeply appreciated his wisdom. And, I am wondering what 2021 will look like if I can live consciously?? What might my relationships feel like if I am conscious about each and every thought, word and deed that I offer others? I know it would be impossible to do it 100% of the time, but I wonder what it would be like if I made this my intent for 2021 …

If I am living consciously, I will be choosing my next step rather than mindlessly moving forward by default. If I am living consciously, I will notice when I am off track and can ‘reroute’ and get myself back on track more quickly. If I am living consciously, then I can disrupt any old patterns that are subconsciously leading me to recreate the past instead of the future.

Yes, if I am living consciously, I can turn on my own internal light and let it lead the way. I really like the sound of that for the New Year … the new day … the new next moment. Fingers crossed I can remain conscious enough often enough to do it … 

Happy 2021 to one and all … 🧡 Karen 🧡